There is every shade of red here, from the deep, deep burgundy of the orchid and the rose, through the bright scarlets of the tulips, poppies and lilies, to the smoked salmon of Auntie Anne's Geranium.

The climate-aware viewer will have already noted that not all of these can grow in my garden - for example, the orchid sits happily in my kitchen, thriving on the steam from the washing up.

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